By the Way.

Usually I try to keep this blog fun and light ( I think), but lately, my mind hasn't been fun and light, so here's my thoughts on this. Hope you don't mind!

Being a momma is HARD! Did you know this? Many times a week I remind myself that I only have ONE baby, and many of you have many more daily challenges than me.

Deborah, you take care of THREE BOYS, cook amazing meals, clean, keep a house, are involved in church, and take care of your hubby!

Ellen, you are in California without any family, and are raising two under two while your husband studies and works late hours.

Many of you work and stay home, AND do everything else that keeps a house going!

I stay home and sometimes struggle to have a good attitude raising one little boy!

When Eli was younger and less active, I was perfectly content to snuggle up in my house with my sweet baby and do homebody things. Now that he is getting older and is all over the place, I find myself frustrated and impatient some days. Yesterday, from teeth or something, he fussed ALL DAY LONG, and I was less than patient. All day long this verse replayed in my head, "I lift my eyes unto the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, maker of Heaven and Earth." Put that on repeat all day yesterday.

I know he's just going to get more active, but when my eight month old is throwing tantrums, I struggle to find my postive outlook. Does this happen to you? please, oh please, say it does.

The other thought on my mind is loneliness. When I was teaching high school, my colleagues and I would talk about how isolating teaching can be. You are in your room all day dealing with teenagers and all their "stuff," and you plan and grade all by yourself in your room...it can be solitary and lonely. Well, being a mom is like that, but MORE.

Staying in makes for one lonely momma. My conversations consist of telling Eli that "Momma's folding this shirt, Let's make lunch, Did you just go potty?, Let's dust this table"...One-sided conversations get old. This age is a little difficult because Eli can't do bigger kid things, like play gyms, and crafts, etc. However, I know that EVERY age has its own set of challenges, and I need to just get out and about regardless of nap times and schedules.

Two naps and feeding schedules get in the way sometimes of planning play groups and dates, and some days I just feel alone and well, bored. I can only play with a xylophone so many times before my own mind needs to be stimulated.
Here's another little song I've been singing lately,
"In the morning, when I rise, give me Jesus. And when I am alone, give me Jesus...."

Right? In my moments of impatience and weakness, I NEED help from Jesus, prayer, friends, community. I have never understood our need for community and fellowship more than now, and I know that's why God wants that for us. We are meant to help eachother. Pray for eachother. Support eachother.

Man, this was a lot to give you on a chilly Tuesday morning. Sorry for the depressing post. I'm sure ( I hope) most of you mommas have felt this way at one time or another.

By the way, I just got home from a playgroup, and God is saying, "See? Fellowship is good. Good for baby, good for mama, good for everyone!" Thanks for the invite Katie!